If A Zombie Apocalypse Would Come, I'd Be Carrying A Hammer

Well you read the title. As a kid, I've collected monthly issues and issues of the K-zone magazines and I've always been fond of the "Which shit are you.." tests. Where shit is a variable of just about anything, but the popular ones are of which job is more suited for you, mainly with reference to Ragnarok jobs or any other online game. Seriously, there can't be tests which will determine what kind of shit you are. I don't even think there's a variety of it. But if such a test exist, I call dibs on being THE shit. And if there is a test on which weapon is best suited for your personality, I hope mine's a hammer.

To tell you why I wanted a hammer to be my weapon would be pretty hard because I haven't really thought about it either. I mean, there's an Apocalypse for heaven's sake and we realistically would not be choosy now would we? I'd still continue this post however, so lets just imagine that the Apocalypse would be the theme of an online game which is our world #FeelingInception #EwHashtagsAgain. In fact, since I'm still a fan of choosing jobs, let's choose our job. For those who are not familiar with classic online game jobs, we have the Warrior who normally deals the physical damage, the Tank who takes all the damage, the Mage who does the magical (You don't say?) damage and is usually first to die, the Healer who kills his party members, the Thief who actually I'd rather name as Assassin because zombies aren't supposed to have anything worth stealing, anyways Thieves are the agile, stealthy guys, and lastly the Hunters who uses long range attacks. Now, imagine this with me. 

I prefer and will choose to play as the Healer. For starters, I feel really needed; healers are usually sought after. Also, I just find it really cool, the idea that the weak, gentle, lifesaving priest can also be a strong, life-taking killer. Being what others think I'm not or not being what others think I am, that's very much like me. Besides, the Undead are supposed to bow down to my divine holy spells. 

As for the Hammer, it's probably because it's non cliche. People would usually choose something easily lethal like a sword, blade, or whatever. People who are very realistic would just say a gun. But my hammer is not just a carpentry hammer, mind you, imagine Thor's, that's my kind of hammer. Choosing a hammer, I guess would be pretty fun.  There's the thrill of not being able to whack that zombie hard enough and I still get bitten as I walk away. The coolness as I imagine it hanging in my back. Okay whatever, I can't really justify having a hammer and I'd probably die first in this Apocalypse, like it's even real! Get a life! 

Seriously now though, although I think that I'm capable of defending a life for a life, I still think of myself as gentle in general. The blades, the bullets just send me the murderous intent vibes. Also, I love challenges. It would most definitely be hard surviving with a hammer, but I'd be ready to whack the ooze out of those green heads, and I'd be training! If I get to kill zombies, I know it wasn't because of the sharp edges or the penetrating trajectory, it was because I whacked it hard, because of my strength. Something I worked hard for.

Or I could have killed the mob with the Earthquake I caused after hitting the ground with Cheesecake.What, why would I name my hammer, Cheesecake, pschh. -_-.

Which job are you, and what weapon will you yield? Yeah yield.